If a movie was made about your life today, what kind of movie would it be? Would it make it to the box office or would there be like one copy of it somewhere on the bottom shelf at Blockbuster? Would the movie be full of twists and turns, risks and triumphs, or would it be humdrum, boring, and safe? Would your life story cause people to stand up and take notice or fall asleep in the theater? Donald Miller was faced with this same question. After writing a best-selling book, he found himself in a funk that had him depressed, lonely, and unmotivated to even get out of bed. After two movie producers approached him about basing a movie on his life story, he is confronted with the reality that his life’s narrative is dull and lackluster. Faced with this reality, he sets out to edit his life story and turn it into a story that is filled with beauty, meaning, and passion. Be prepared to walk with Don through a raw, messy, and intimate journey of his life transformation.

I read a lot of books that are ok. I read a few books that are good. Even fewer that are very good. And every few years I find a book that I can’t get out of my head. It stays with you. It forces you to change. Not in a pushy way, but in an incredibly challenging way.  A Million Miles In A Thousand Years is a “once in a few years” kinda book. It just might be the book that will push you to do something with that dream that has been laying dorment inside of you for years and years. Run, don’t walk to the book store to buy this book. Better yet, just click this link to order it. You won’t be dissappointed…trust me.

I made the statement in yesterdays post…

The absence of sexual boundaries is the presence of an imminent affair.

We often walk so close to the edge of sin that we leave no margin for error. We walk the tightrope with no safety net. Sometimes we dangle so close to sin that one wrong move and we’re dead meat. Boundaries serve as our safety net. If we can set our sexual boundaries away from the edge, we give ourselves plenty of warning of the imminent danger that lies ahead.

Here are 5 essential sexual boundaries to guard against an affair.

1. Flirting is never OK, unless it’s with your spouse. When you flirt you are sending a message (unintentionally or not) that you are interested and available. It’s a “green light” to the person to continue pursuing. Paul told Timothy, “treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.”
2. Avoid being alone with anyone of the opposite sex. It might mean taking two cars. It might mean changing the meeting place so that it’s in public. It might mean hiring a “same-sex” administrative assistant if your job involves working alone with the person. Does this seem overly cautious? Maybe, but we have an enemy – Satan, that prowls around like a lion looking for a marriage to destroy! And the first mistake is to think that your marriage is invincible.
3. If you find yourself starting to be attracted to someone else who isn’t your spouse, or if someone is becoming attracted to you redefine the relationship quickly! It might mean changing your schedule to avoid contact. It might mean keeping your contact with the person to an absolute minimum. It might mean finding a new friend. Which is a lot better than losing your spouse!
4. Give your spouse complete access to your email, your phone history,  and your calendar. There are NO SECRETS except what you bought them for Christmas! Anything that is a secret now, becomes a wedge later. Be an open book.
5. When your mind starts to think about what it would be like to have an affair, think about the damage & destruction that it will do to your spouse, your family, and your relationship with God. You will ruin your spouse. You will ruin your kids. And you will break the heart of God. It’s simply not worth it.

What are some other boundaries that I might have missed?

Wonder can be found in everything that we do, if we look for it. It can be found in the most mundane chore, in the thoughtless task, and in the routine minutes of the day. Wonder is what can turn an ordinary walk into an extraordinary exploration. Wonder can turn a boring job into an exciting adventure. We lose the wonder amidst the routine machine of life. I think E. Merrill Root is exactly right. He said…

“We need a renaissance of wonder. We need to renew, in our hearts and in our souls, the deathless dream, the eternal poetry, the perennial sense that life is a miracle.” – E. Merrill Root

I think wonder comes easier in unfamiliar territory before the routine machine takes over. I’m looking forward to a renaissance of wonder this coming week as Naomi and I head to a part of the Country where we have never been to. I’m looking forward to renewing the wonder as we discover the beauty of Sedona, AZ and the Grand Canyon.I’m also looking forward to renewing the wonder of our marriage as we spend some quality time together.

Do you need a renaissance of wonder?

On Monday, my wife and I will be celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary. Here are 18 things I’ve learned from 18 years of marriage in no particular order…

1. I’ve learned that time hasn’t helped me find the clothes hamper any easier.
2. I’ve learned how much my wife appreciates the simple acts of love in life. Like bringing her a coffee home from Starbucks or cooking dinner to give her a night off.
3. I’ve learned how important it is to have a sturdy lock on the bedroom door
4. I’ve learned how much I don’t miss the steady diet of Hamburger Helper from the first two years of marriage. I didn’t find it all that helpful.
5. I’ve learned that the two words “I’m sorry” diffuses most bombs and the three words “I’m sorry, but” always lights the fuse.
6. I’ve learned how much my leadership(good or bad) affects our family. I feel the weight of that responsibility more than ever.
7. I’ve learned that God always provides. Some of our greatest memories are how God has provided throughout our marriage.
8. I’ve learned how much my wife makes me better in everything that I do.
9. I’ve learned that the cheapest dates are often the most meaningful ones.
10. I’ve learned that my wife is the greatest filter that I have. I run everything through her filter. Her discernment and intuition is unlike anyone I know!
11. I’ve learned that you can take the girl out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the girl…I love my country girl through and through!
12. I’ve learned that what my wife lacks in spelling, she makes up for a hundredfold in her wisdom.
13. I’ve learned how much a simple word or small touch makes my wife’s day.
14. I’ve learned the value of trust. I can honestly say, my wife has never once given me a reason to question my trust in her.
15. I’ve learned that she is the best household manager that I could ever ask for.
16. I’ve learned to care less of what other people think but I’ve learned to care more of what my wife thinks.
17. I’ve learned that every day that we have together is a gift that I need to treasure.
18. I’ve learned that there is direct correlation between my love for Jesus and my love for my wife. The more I fall in love with Jesus, the more I fall in love with my wife.

What have you learned from marriage?

You have probably already seen the video of Susan Boyle stunning the judges and audience of Britain’s Got Talent. It has circulated it’s way through every social media outlet at lightning speed.

In just one week, this viral video has been viewed more than 48 million times (according to Visible Measures). This graph shows just how viral this video is in relation to other highly viewed videos.

Why has this video received such amazing popularity so quickly?

Would this video be just as popular if Susan was a twenty something, attractive, well-spoken individual? Probably not. Susan took the world by storm because nobody expected what was delivered. It was a complete surprise. Every outward indication was that Susan was just an average person and her voice was going to be average (at best) as well. People had written her off as a person not living in reality….that is until she opened her mouth to sing.

I love this story because it’s a picture of God’s surprise reverse economy. It’s exactly how God works. Look at these verses…

Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. ²⁷But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. ²⁸He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, ²⁹so that no one may boast before him. 1 Corinthians 1:26-29

The purpose of God’s surprise reverse economy is so that God receives the glory for the results, not us. As followers of Christ, we have an opportunity to show the world the power of Christ that lives within us. Even though every indication is that we are average, weak, and foolish…when we open our mouth to sing our life song, it should absolutely take the world by surprise. And when it does…give God the glory…It’s God’s surprise reverse economy!